one at a time

it’s easier to deal with one mistake at a time as opposed to several the premise here is simple: just because you have put your head in the noose doesn’t mean you have to jump

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addict

don’t touch that, your going to get burned why did you do that ”because at least i can feel it, it hurts but nothing else gives me a feeling” ”now that it owns me, it’s the only time i’m alive……, when i’m not hooked up, i am like an inflatable…

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westover tony

i grew up on the streets, my choice, i just gravitated to it it has taken some time to sift the hustle out of me most of it’s gone but i still remember and sometimes still act out …………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. westover tony, God sent me by your house today and that…

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practice doing nothing

seems odd to phrase  it that way, but such is the nature of the world today we have become so used to being turned on, tuned in, plugged up that one must make a concerted effort at times ”just to be” and not be ”doing” the rest afforded reminds me…

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getting back to me

i’m finally getting back to me after most of my demons are free they decided to run away when they knew i wouldn’t play their crazy hurtful games any more   i was the one who invited them in because i was scared of who i am not the best…

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the bottom took me to the top

i don’t always know how to explain things and i’ve learned that sometimes it a waste of time to try but some will know what i’m talking about and some won’t go through that in their life some of us look for shortcuts and we miss learning how to play…

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one drink away

sometimes it seem so long ago, but i must remember what it took from me break it down to the bare essentials, i’m still just one drink away one drink away from a life that consumed me, one drink that will lead to the candy store and the man standing…

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i stop to look

everyday i try to stop and look at the things You have made and marvel at the details of every flower and tree it is beyond my imagination to try and conceive the mind of someone life You to create the things You have made so i leave those thoughts…

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tomorrow’s a brand new day

that guitar sits over in the corner sometimes at night it calls to me ”i could help you with your problems , if you would sit  sit down and talk to me” ”i know things didn’t turn out like you wanted…… i know your mad and your peeved” ” but…

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nobody died/it will be okay

when i awoke this morning i was greeted by several piles of dog sh………………t that could have determined the beginning of my day, but it didn’t nobody died /it will be okay a family member needed a loan and irritated me because of their spending habits nobody died /it will…

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never know unless you try

you will never know the possibilities that are there for you and me unless you venture forth to see, you’ll never know unless you try sometimes things seem so far away, but they can come closer day by day with the slightest effort and change of mind, you’ll never know…

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really? better rethink that

how many times have you heard a professed Christian: say a racist remark make fun of someone mentally challenged put down alternative lifestyles say one thing and do another use fowl and abusive language judge others without the slightest knowledge about them place themselves above others the list could go…

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noitall

since you ”noitall” i guess you are finished, so go have a seat in the corner and we’ll come get you if we need answers what’s that you have been sitting there for three days and no one has come to inquire of you perhaps most people would rather muddle…

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focus

set your mind and your heart to the person you want to be, and head in that direction there will be trials and challenges but stay the course and watch for signs and messages it will not be easy, but the rewards will be plain to see a life based…

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mo-men-tous

the momentous occasion i have been waiting for is probably not going to happen today or tomorrow or next week, next  year or in the forseeable future the day that i stop letting people control me by stirring up my latent anger…. waiting by the door ready to pounce like…

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request

i ply this prayer to the ”Great Unkown”, that You would watch over me and protect my home use me as You see fit to be an example to those who are quick to dismiss, You as ”make believe” i have seen Your power and grace, in other lives and…

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never saw you crying, but you were/ for anthony b

funny a man can travel to the remotest places on earth and yet the greatest distance he will ever face is from his heart to his head i know you used heroin and kicked that habit, and substituted alcohol in its place there are many things that can take your…

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Why God?

i wonder how many times a day You are plied with that question, ”Why God Why” at least a hundred of those inquires are from me i am constantly reminding myself that i don’t understand Your Ways, and why You  do certain things and other times it seems You choose…

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almost

”almost” is like talking to a ghost not quite, close but not enough………………………………………almost is a fulcrum that teeters between your best attempt or a half-hearted effort that you decide ”is good enough”, which is short for ”i’m lazy and i don’t want to do it” the predicament is resolved only…

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come home/ or farewell

come home from your fog and sit on the porch, sleep if your eyes need to close i won’t tell anyone you are here, just the two of us will know, give yourself a few days off the wheel and see which way you want to go we both know…

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fly away

someone who i watched regularly on t.v., decided he had enough and wanted to be free so he ended his tour and that’s that, except for all the people he left scratching their heads he went everywhere talking about people and their food, enjoying perhaps their libations a little too…

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the gardener and the mule

my wife is a good gardener and i’m a pretty good mule she shows me where to put the dirt and calls me when she needs a tool i did not always like my role until one morning i sat on the deck the morning sun was coming up and…

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no diplomas

there are no diplomas for this test call ”life” you pick up pieces and try to connect the dots you ask questions and try to remain green, just when you think you have learned something, you get stumped on that very thing but the learning turns out to be the…

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weavers

i wasn’t aware that i was joining the weaving club but that’s basically what it is all of us are on a spiritual journey whether we acknowledge it or not those of us who actively seek the journey are part of the ”universal weaving club” we take bits and pieces…

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parodoxical

you will never know how far this can go, until you let go we have been schooled to hold on, hang in there, tighten up when in reality we need to learn to let go, let life flow, let go of our grip and loosen up we are taught that…

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feelings vs. facts

my lenses are not clear, perhaps i need to step away from here to a different vantage point where i can separate ” what is ” from what ” i want ” ”what is” needs to be seen in a different light whereas now there is hurt and strife,  i…

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wait

waiting has always been a problem for me impatient, demanding, for which i have paid dearly hard for me to reconstruct events where i have lost, by waiting but not hard at all to recall calamities as a direct result of running in front of the horses ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… measured steps,…

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the trap

my big mouth is the worlds most efficient trap, catches me all the time i wish i could say that it amazes me the little restraint i offer when the bull is about to leave the pen but it doesn’t, i have said this before, if i ever have the attention,…

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companion

sometimes He leads the way, sometimes He follows me sometimes i feel His hand on my shoulder and hear Him when He breathes sometimes it’s just footsteps that remind me He is by my side i feel it very comforting to know He cares that much it never feels imposing,…

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want vs. need

”need” had a conversation with ”want” need: ” man you are cluttering up this joint, the slightest whim and you are off again in search of the missing part” want spoke up and said: ” it’s not just stuff, i earned these things and it gives me a little joy…

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