my grandma had a cookie jar on the counter in the kitchen and she said that it was her place where she put things she wanted to remember

warning us that it was ”off limits” and she better not find us kids snooping around it

i suppose that was a fair predictor of the path that i would follow through childhood, teenage years and well into adulthood, sorry to say

if you told me not too, that was enough to excite the defiant streak in me to do the thing i was plainly warned against

we spent the school year in Richmond, Va., and the summers we often were shipped to Cleveland, Tenn., to summer with my grandparents giving my parents a break and time for projects around the house to take place without the hindrances of kids

as a teen i rarely did drink or smoke pot there, it wasn’t readily available with my limited circle of friends, but the behavior was there………. it just wasn’t regularly fueled……………however the behavior modification it induced lingered

one day I was alone with my brother playing around the house and fields by her house

there was also a creek that ran through the property, they called the ”branch” that yielded all sorts of opportunities for mischief

a highlight of the summer was to burn the grass fort that we constructed by boxing the grass in compressed blocks that we figured out how to make with a good cardboard box and stacking them in staggered layers until we achieved the height we wanted and using and old canvas tarp for the roof

it was the bomb…………………people would often ride by and take pictures

anyway……………….

i went to the kitchen to fill up bottles of water………………..there was that cookie jar calling to me

i approached it as if it was fitted with a security device and it was

she had a piece of clear tape that went across from bottom to the lid

i knew she was slick so i was very observant

inside were plastic bags with each grandchild’s name and birthday

coins and bills were jammed into each bag

i smiled for a minute then came back to reality fearing i might be caught

i placed everything back in the jar and replaced the sliver of tape that notified of an invasion

i filled the bottles with water and returned to the field, no questions asked

i never mentioned the infraction to anyone, until now

i think my grandma new i had peeked although she never brought it up

on my 18th birthday she sent a card and a check for $500 towards my first car

i know she knew that the invasion had occurred, and i know she was aware that i knew she was aware

nothing was ever said but a look followed by a laser beam connection between us was enough, saying volumes

she let it slide to the extent she didn’t bring it up to the adults

but we knew………………..and grandma thanks for giving me lots of breaks……………………….but in your heart you knew it would go down just like it did