after all this time, not young……….not old, I still find myself working against myself and making hasty decisions that I know are wrong when I am doing them

really not much different from a game we played as kids ”throw the knife”, yes we were hoodlums and barely missed being put in ”juvey”, juvenile detention

anyway the point of the game was to get as close as you could to your foot without hitting your foot, yes this is the truth, we also had rock fights

we would play for change or cigarettes, push ups ,………………………whatever

I had a few holes in my shoes and many nicks on my feet,…………………………we stopped playing after Troy who was essentially blind, hit a vein and had to go to the hospital

I am diabetic,………………………not to bad at this point but I’m working on it, not in a good way

never have cared for sweets……………………………until now and it is out of control

is it because it’s not good for me, because I want what I want and to hell with it

doesn’t matter, I am my worst enemy and my best friend which causes quite a spiritual battle

this kind of behavior is self-destruction in the worst way

just hurting myself….pray for me and I will pray for you

getting better isn’t about pretty………………..it about accepting where you are and going from there