replica/noun/an exact copy/one on a similar scale

my Father was a real piece of work

i bashed Him for years until some of the pain “He” caused became the pain i caused/ time and life changed that perspective   owning things you don’t want sucks but i can’t change what i don’t acknowledge

so my mantra for years ”was anything but Him”  when the truth was ” anything but me”

my Father was both sides of the coin and he could flip faster than you could possibly prepare for the change……………………………………………………….just like me

my Father was generous at times to a fault leaving His family wondering what brought that on and puzzled looks followed by statements like “He never did that for us”………………………………………………………………………………………………..just like me

Dad was after something and He studied the Bible meticulously with a concourse and other tools    But He was never really able to offer love freely, it was painful to watch Him try to be gracious and loving…………………..just like me

he was steadfast and he rode the mule he believed in, into the ground, if He got you, you weren’t warned, you were hung……………………………………………….just like me

He was dependable, hardworking and principled …………………………………just like me

tormented, confused, angry, sullen, vengeful and delicate…………………just like me

I am my Father’s Son, good and bad

i’m 63, don’t mind me, just digging through the trash picking out pieces i need to look at and taking an inventory of what i want to keep, what i need help with/  then having the courage to tell someone         putting a face on God

i now realize  there were reasons He was the man He was and  i am especially grateful that I am His Son and He was my Dad

see you on the beach, Pop